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0 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! is not only difficult to type, but also a new visual novel from Furoshiki Lab. It’s live now on the PlayStation Store for £9.99. Disclaimer: This is not your usual text-based trip through Japanese school life. Instead, we have a story set somewhere between heaven and hell. It’s your job to work the help desk, receiving calls from lost souls in need of direction.
Sounds normal? It isn’t.
Who ya gonna call?
To play 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! is to experience one of the strangest video games ever created. Are you ready for a lore-laden trip to the netherworld? Then come with me. Just bring some biscuits and tea. This is going to be stressful.
Gameplay
Unlike many visual novels that sacrifice gameplay for story beats, 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! has a central mechanic that’s original, fun, and a little panic-inducing. You are Vanitas Vanitatum, former maid to Black Lady Death. In a bit of a career misstep, she’s switched from folding towels to the cut and thrust of a call centre job. This centre is not in the business of cold-calling for double glazing. These communications are from the souls of the recently deceased, and the seconds that follow their demise are spent on the phone with you. You can’t blame them if they are a little… incoherent.
It’s established that poor Vanitas has no idea what’s happening, and soon you, the player, will be utterly confused too. A tutorial skims you through the basics, but the premise goes thus: Answer the calls, direct the Ghosts to the service they require, and then on to the next call. The premise? Simple. The execution? Brutal. Ghosts (or gh0st5 if you prefer) have five seconds to explain their situation before the time runs out. During this, they will bark their current situation in the form of a rapidly scrolling text box. The text is never to the point and rarely makes sense, but that’s the idea. You decide whether the Ghost requires the police, an ambulance, or just directions. Later in the game, humans try to make contact and the option to drop these calls is provided. I did warn you this was a strange game.
Endure The Chaos
All of the above would be challenging enough, but the real twist is that these calls are happening in parallel. This creates a mental cacophony that only a call centre clerk could relate to. Initially, screening the calls will have you pondering and correctly selecting the required service. More often than not, you surrender to the chaos, randomly mashing the buttons in the hope that, by the grace of god, you select the correct option.
Following a fraught few minutes, the day ends, and your performance is graded from S to C rank. The story progression and eventual endgame are affected by this, so it’s just a question of whether your mind can handle the punishment.
Graphics & Audio
Graphically, 1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! does an effective job of making an artistic impact with the bare minimum. The scratchy backdrops and monochrome art are a good fit for the spooky atmosphere. Each character pops with an individual, anime look that could have been scrawled on the back of an exercise book. The characters have only a few frames of animation, but it’s enough to convey the energy and emotional core of the story.
Audio is a mixed bag, with the majority of the game taking place against 90s-sounding drill and bass. While this fits the anxiety levels well, it does grate rather quickly. The sound effects that accompany the Ghost’s calls are all on point. Like a digitally distorted version of someone screaming into a phone receiver wrapped in a tea towel.
Longevity
While a single playthrough clocks in at just over 30 minutes, the humbling feeling from a run of C grades will have you going back for more. True enough, the game’s story is a little bloated, often explaining backstory points that never crop up again; but these can be skipped. With enough time and dedication, muscle memory starts to kick in, and soon you will be directing calls with the skill and verve of an emergency help desk clerk.
Final Thoughts
1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! is high on tropes and text, but the actual game within is curiously alluring. If you are a fan of visual novels with a splash of innovation, you will enjoy the calm of the story elements versus the storm of incoming calls. To coin an appropriate cliché, it’s a game of two halves that balance each other out into a fun-filled few minutes.
1f y0u’re a gh0st ca11 me here! is a deserving winner of the Thumb Culture Silver Award!
Disclaimer: A code was received in order to write this review.
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